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The Dynasty Aftermath: Indiana Jones and the One-Armed Man

We cover the aftermath of training camps.

Spoiler alert: MAJOR spoilers for the 1993 movie “The Fugitive” are included. If you haven’t seen it in theaters yet, stop reading.

Welcome to DLF’s Dynasty Aftermath. This staple article is our longest running signature piece as we have a little fun at the Dynasty League Football office. This article typically reviews the week’s happenings in a variety of ways and helps set you up for the coming weeks during the season. However, I wanted to do something different this year and bring it back during the off-season at some critical moments to provide some perspective and advice.

I’ve written this column for the past seventeen years and I love it. I enjoy combing through the stats of the week on Monday night, putting together ridiculous lineups, picking MVPs/LVPs and discussing things to worry about. That’s not all. I also really love sharing observations, little bits of entertainment or some stories with the community of DLF and picking a theme for this column each week during the season. You really never know what you’re going to get.

I’m a huge Indiana Jones fan. I also have a tendency to sit down, go to the channel guide and have random movies playing in the background while I work. Just the other day I saw a movie called The Fugitive, which should have obviously been called “Indiana Jones and the One-Armed Man.” Yep, it’s time for a movie review (spoilers about The Fugitive are included but if you haven’t seen it already, it’s probably at a local goodwill on VHS).

The movie starts with Indiana Jones having changed careers from being a professor to being a vascular surgeon. He’s also aged super well as it’s the 90s and he’s still alive. He gets called in to the hospital to do a surgery and has to leave his wife at his apartment. When he gets home, he walks into a struggle between his wife and a one-armed man who I think was probably an aging Nazi, but I couldn’t 100% tell. The guy gets away and the Chicago cops think Indiana Jones killed her even after they play a phone recording that clearly has her saying someone named “Richard” was involved.

After being sentenced to death, Jones is on his way to prison on a bus. He’s remarkably calm likely because he’s survived the wrath of God, a giant rock chasing him, a weird bald guy who can pull people’s hearts out of their chest (I think that might have been how he got interested in being a vascular surgeon) and a whole band of Nazi soldiers who wanted to kill him before he could find the holy grail. The bus gets in an accident and Jones saves a few people before jumping off to avoid getting hit by a train and goes on the run.

Enter Tommy Lee Jones.

With Indiana Jones on the lamb, Tommy Lee Jones enters the movie and starts chasing him around the woods. This goes on for quite some time before Jones solves the mystery and finds the one-armed man who killed his wife. I expected some snakes and booby traps or puzzles at some point but Jones obviously didn’t like this lifestyle and that probably leads into this next movie called, “Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny.” My guess is that movie will reveal something about Tommy Lee Jones being the long-lost brother of Indiana Jones, but that hasn’t been verified on Rotten Tomatoes.

Anyway.

Let’s talk about the dynasty landscape now that the NFL Draft has come and gone and we have some observations from rookie mini-camp. This edition of The Dynasty Aftermath is dedicated to the rookie class of 2023.

Dynasty Rookie of the Year Prediction

It’s just too easy, isn’t it? Over the past 20 years, there have been some players who were hyped as the next big thing including Reggie Bush, Adrian Peterson, Calvin Johnson, Saquon Barkley, and a few others. This year, it’s Robinson, who looks like the new engine for the Atlanta offense and a bona fide first round rookie pick in start-ups, not to mention the consensus 1.01 in rookie drafts. Running backs are never a sure thing but Robinson looks like he’s about as close as you can get.

Dynasty Rookie of the Year who isn’t Bijan Robinson Prediction

With the trade of D’Andre Swift to Philadelphia, Jahmyr Gibbs looks primed to be a serious weapon in Detroit. I considered Jaxon Smith-Njigba for this spot as well but Gibbs looks like a top three rookie pick destined to produce a solid early return on your investment.

Dynasty Rookie LVP Prediction

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say Dalvin Cook is going to end up in Miami after being released by Minnesota. If that’s the case, the short-term value of Devon Achane is going to be severely affected. Achane is still a solid rookie selection but early drafters used mid-to-high first round rookie draft capital on him and that would be a serious buzzkill.

The Unbeatable Rookie Lineup of the Year Prediction

QB CJ Stroud HOU
RB Bijan Robinson ATL
RB Jahmyr Gibbs DET
RB Zach Charbonnet SEA
WR Jaxon Smith-Njigba SEA
WR Zay Flowers BAL
WR Jordan Addison MIN
TE Michael Mayer LV

I like Stroud to be the most NFL-ready of the quarterbacks, though his supporting cast isn’t exactly elite. Charbonnet is going to get more opportunities than most people think. I’ll take the trio of JSN, Flowers and Addison as the three best receivers. I also believe the price tag on Dalton Kincaid is a little steep at the moment with Dawson Knox still in town. I’ll take Mayer as the rookie TE1 as a safety valve for an offense that needs one.

The Underdog Rookie Lineup of the Year Prediction

QB Will Levis TEN
RB Kendre Miller NO
RB Roschon Johson CHI
RB Chris Rodriguez WAS
WR Jonathan Mingo CAR
WR Tank Dell HOU
WR Josh Downs IND
TE Luke Musgrave GB

My guess is Levis takes over sooner rather than later. Kendre Miller needs to get healthy, but I like his chances with Kamara’s future in doubt. The Bears look like they’re committed to a going with a RBBC and Rodriguez is my shot in the dark at the moment. Mingo, Downs, and Dell all have upside and Musgrave is taking the early lead in Green Bay.

The Disappointing Rookie Lineup of the Year Prediction

QB Anthony Richardson IND
RB Tyjae Spears TEN
RB Devon Achane MIA
RB Tank Bigsby JAX
WR Quentin Johnston LAC
WR Rashee Rice KC
WR Marvin Mims DEN
TE Dalton Kincaid BUF

I don’t believe these players are going to be bad. Instead, I think they just may have a hard time justifying their price tags. Richardson has huge upside but people need to remember he’s a major project player. If Cook ends up in Miami, early rookie drafters are going to be very disappointed. I also don’t see Bigsby or Spears emerging this early in their career. I like Quentin Johnston but it’s not his time as of yet. Rice and Mims also need some time to develop and Kincaid is being drafted too highly, at least in my opinion.

Gut Checks

I’d be worried if I was counting on Alvin Kamara this season.

I’d be worried if I had invested much in Malik Willis.

I’d be worried if I was building around Saquon Barkley. This needs to get resolved.

I’d be worried if I was counting too much on Nick Chubb. The Browns are going to throw the ball.

I’d be worried if I was sleeping on Irv Smith.

I’d be worried if I didn’t have every Seattle running back rostered.

I’d be worried if I saw a one-armed man in my closet.

I’d be worried if I was expecting anything from Hendon Hooker any time soon.

I’d be worried if I thought Dalton Kincaid was that much better than Michael Mayer or Sam LaPorta.

I’d be worried if I thought veterans weren’t still incredibly valuable. People give up way too soon.

I’d be worried if I thought TJ Hockenson couldn’t repeat that.

I’d be worried if I didn’t buy low on Deebo Samuel.

I’d be worried if I didn’t always carry a whip and a satchel bag.

I’d be worried if I was just ignoring Michael Thomas. Long shot, but…

I’d be worried if I didn’t think this was a pivotal year for Najee Harris.

Ditto for Deshaun Watson.

I’d be worried if I was just expecting vintage OBJ.

I’d be worried if I couldn’t navigate booby traps and biblical quizzes.

I’d be worried if I was still waiting to buy on Garrett Wilson.

I’d be worried if I was counting on any other Jets pass catcher.

I’d be worried if I had Tommy Lee Jones on my tail.

I’d be worried if I had any Miami running back at the moment.

I’d be worried if I was just throwing away Tyler Allgeier.

I’d be worried if I was expecting a repeat TD performance from Jamaal Williams.

I’d be worried if I had Clyde Edwards-Helaire.

I’d be worried if I thought Adam Thielen was done.

I’d be worried if I didn’t know how to shield my rib cage when someone is trying to pull out my heart.

I’d be worried if I was down on Drake London.

I’d be worried if I forgot about Calvin Ridley.

I’d be worried if I was building around Trey Lance.

I’d be worried if I was thinking Breece Hall wasn’t still a great long-term investment.

See you soon!

Ken Kelly
The Dynasty Aftermath: Indiana Jones and the One-Armed Man
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Chad Gorick
11 days ago

I’d be worried if that guy with the scary coat hanger and the burnt hand showed up at my door. So glad your I’d be worried’s are back Ken!

Johnny D
11 days ago

man, how I missed this series! loving it Ken – TY sir.
Great calls on Cook displacing Achane’s first year, Gibbs looking the part, Deebo buy low, and downside calls on Clyde, OBJ, and maybe Chubb.

Drew Elsberry
10 days ago

I’d be worried if I didn’t have Data from Goonies or Sean Connery with an umbrella by my side. Glad to have you back, Ken!

Mark Boutot
10 days ago

The original TV series was a worthwhile watch and quite popular back in the day as well.

Jacob Smith
9 days ago

I’d be worried if I didn’t have a bag of sand when getting ready to make a trade.

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